Spring Cleaning

It may feel more like the middle of winter with snow on the ground and school closures (and more snow forecast) but it doesn't stop me from getting excited about spring cleaning.

At the beginning of last year, my eldest daughter had just bought a house with her boyfriend and I put in a lot of time and energy helping with the decorating and cleaning. Of course we're not talking a quick wipe with a cloth sort of cleaning. We're talking scrubbing with an old toothbrush into every nook and cranny sort of cleaning. Blast it with every chemical cleaner known to man sort of cleaning. The sort of cleaning that leaves you exhausted, aching and with painfully tortured skin on your once soft, smooth hands.

My own home was sadly neglected as a consequence.

Not so this year. 

This year, armed with my weapons of choice - a micro-fibre cloth, Parazone spray bleach and the trusted old toothbrush - I am attacking the dirty corners of my home with great enthusiasm.

I have already used two whole bottles of bleach cleaner on window frames and skirting boards and two old toothbrushes have been rendered almost bristle-less. And I am loving it.

I love rinsing out my cloth and watching the filthy water swirl away down the sink. I love the smell of clean. I love taking control and creating order from chaos.

I am finding all sorts of minor (and major) repairs that will need to be attended to over the coming months and there are plenty of places that would benefit from a lick of paint. Rather than being daunted by the mammoth task ahead, I feel inspired and ready to tackle anything. It really is like seeing things with the fresh eyes of someone moving into a new home.

I would love to think that my rooms would stand up to inspection by the Obsessive Compulsive Cleaners of the Channel 4 series - that I could be worthy of joining their bucket wielding army, making Britain a cleaner place one house at a time. Any illusions I may have had about that were shattered when my eldest daughter run a finger over a forgotten shelf in my kitchen to reveal more than a little dust! 

My battle against the dirt and disorder continues. Every shiny surface a triumph for me. Whether I will ever make enough headway to compensate for the tireless mess makers that are my children (and husband), I don't know... but I will persevere. And love every minute of it.

My top tips for Spring Cleaning:

1) Invest in good rubber gloves to protect your hands. I use bizzybee multipurpose gloves. They are comfortable, easy to get on and off and are still going strong after a serious amount of scrubbing!

2) Keep your cleaning equipment clean and well organised. When you are trying to create order from chaos in your home it helps to start with order in your brushes, sprays and cloths.

3) Never underestimate the power of elbow grease. No matter what claims the cleaning products make about 'simply wipe clean' or 'rinse away for a sparkling finish', a bit of elbow grease invariably gives a better result. 

4) Don't be afraid of the dirt. Dive in and deal with it.

5) Vacuum walls and ceilings as well as floors. It might look a bit crazy but it is amazing how much dust can accumulate on those surfaces.

6) Remember that the more effort you put into your cleaning, the more calories you are burning. A good work out with the bonus of a clean home - perfect.

Goodbye to an Old Friend

I don't even remember when the latex Pinhead mask came into my life but for the last 8 years it has been propped on the windowsill of my front room. Pinhead from Clive Barker's Hellraiser was a character that I adored. I loved the horror genre. I thought that Clive Barker was a total visionary. I thought that  Doug Bradley, the actor that breathed life into the Pinhead character, was inspired. I bought the DVD. I allowed myself to be scared, fascinated and spellbound by the storytelling. My friend Kirk gave me the mask.

I absolutely loved that mask. I tried to find one of those head mannequins for wigs to display it (I used to have one that I bought in a jumble sale once but have no idea what became of it). In the end, I stuffed it loosely with tissue paper and put the whole thing over the top of a suitably shaped vase. It looked amazing. And scary. My children confessed to being 'freaked out' by it but I did not let that deter me from displaying it prominently.

Nearly sixteen years ago, after the birth of my fourth daughter, I organised a Christening for all my girls. I was never much of a church goer but my eldest daughter was a member of the church choir and expressed a desire to be officially welcomed into the Christian family.  We did all four girls together. It was a lovely day with lots of pink, a beautiful cake, balloons and flowers (and a splash or four of holy water). Before the ceremony, the vicar came to our house to meet with us and discuss the solemnity of the occasion. He was more than a little alarmed by the Pinhead mask that I hadn't even considered moving out of respect for a sensitive man of God. Once I convinced him that I wasn't a devil worshipper (or worse) and that my interest in horror films was purely rooted in entertainment, he relaxed!

The mask was not very effective as a mask. The horrible rubbery smell inside was almost unbearable. It was not exactly breathable so you would overheat very quickly within its confines. Also, the rods that represented  Pinhead's pins (or rather 6" nails!) fell out a little too easily. It was only ever used as an ornament.

At Christmas, I would sometimes give him a festive flourish.

Many times we have had young offenders at our door selling overpriced J-cloths and dusters as part of a rehabilitation programme. I find it very uncomfortable saying no but often when they spot Pinhead through my front window, hard selling is forgotten and conversation turns to films. I have had many film recommendations made from the young men who have not had the best start in life along with confessions of their crimes and their hopes for the future. I don't know if I should be alarmed by the correlation between criminal behaviour and obsession with the horror genre but I am always happy to have had a meaningful exchange rather than being forced to shut the door in their faces.

Pinhead has been been part of our family for a long, long time. He is so familiar, I barely notice him. My little ones have never been unnerved by his presence. Recently, I was cleaning the windowsill where he resides. I was shocked by how old and tired the poor thing had become. The latex was very brittle and splitting in many places. The number of pins protruding from his skull were seriously depleted in number. I found several on the floor below, like dead leaves from a tree in autumn.

With huge regret, I felt that the time may be close to saying goodbye. I could never bring myself to throw him coldly into the dustbin. He would need to be carefully placed in an appropriate receptacle and stored away in a dusty recess befitting of an iconic dark soul.

Today, I took a deep breathe and actually did it. A coffin shaped empty chocolate box with black satin lining seemed a perfect final resting pace for my old friend. It was a delicate procedure to remove the rubber skin from the vase and tissue that had given him shape for so long. The vase was a gift from my sister who died many years ago. It was nice to have it back. The tissue paper was suitably yellowed and crackly.

It was impossible not to damage the fragile thing further as I placed it in the box and closed the lid. Even as it split and rained pins onto the floor, I couldn't help thinking what an incredibly powerful image it still possessed.

Goodbye old friend. You have silently witnessed monumental changes in my life. Your imperceptibly slow decay marked the passage of years. Your time in the sunlight is over.  Gather dust now. Wait in the dark. One day, someone might discover a coffin shaped box and wonder what lies inside. Be ready for that day, old friend. Be ready.

A pre-Xmas clear out

I've seen the fridge magnet that states "A clean house is the sign of a boring person"

I have tried to subscribe to this view on the occasions that the enormity of household tasks gets the better of me. What difference does it really make if I haven't dusted/vacuumed/cleaned the bathroom/made the beds etc? Why waste time with housework when I could be doing something much less 'boring'? But for me, it does make difference. A huge difference.

When my house is clean and tidy and well organised, I feel ready for anything. I don't want to stagnate in front of Jeremy Kyle - I want to get up and do something.

The something that I am currently trying to get up and do is 'Christmas'.

Where the sparkly seasonal aisles of my local supermarket have failed to get my festive juices flowing, a good clear out at home has succeeded.

I am far from finished but three black sacks for the dump and three sacks of old clothing waiting to be recycled are evidence of the progress I have made.

Clearing out my cupboards clears my mind - a mind ready to fill with all things Christmassy.

Today, I put the fruit for my Xmas cake to soak in brandy. I am much later than I would have liked but as the saying goes, better late than never. Never would have deprived me from the sheer pleasure of stirring the glistening bowl of fruity jewels and breathing in the promise of richness.


I've not yet started my Christmas shopping but I have had some ideas - ideas that excite me rather than the desperate search round crowded shops to find anything vaguely suitable.

Christmas dinner is a big event for me. As a vegetarian, I always want to produce a show stopper that satisfies on many levels and does not leave me dreaming wistfully of the pre-veggie days when a golden, aromatic turkey took centre stage. I have no idea what the 2012 show stopper will be but organising the larder as part of my pre-Xmas clear out has re-ignited my passion for cooking and culinary experimentation. Hopefully, this passion will not wane until long after Xmas dinner is nothing more than a spectacularly happy memory and a few extra pounds on the hips to be shifted with a NewYear run.

The next time someone mentions with an Eeeek! - only so many more weeks/days to Christmas, I refuse to be panicked.  I am going to relax and enjoy every tinsel adorned moment.

Thirst Pockets Multi Cloth - review

I am no germaphobe. It would be a rare day that hand sanitizer found it's way into my shopping basket. However, I do love having a clean and tidy house.

Since my two little ones came along, my clean and tidy ideal has been something I aspire to but never achieve. As quick as I 'clean' and 'tidy', they 'dirty' and 'mess'!

If it came to a choice of spotless home/no children or chaotic mess/children, it really wouldn't be at all difficult. I adore being a mum to my two little terrors and I wouldn't have it any other way.

It doesn't stop me trying to have it all though.

There are two household tasks that I particularly dislike doing - mostly because the time they stay 'done' does not justify the time I spend doing them. As I would happily embrace anything that might make these tasks easier, I was very pleased to be sent the Thirst Pockets Multi Cloth to review.

According to the packaging: Thirst Pockets Multi Cloth is a unique paper towel that cleans like a cloth, its concentrated fibres ensure a cloth-like feel and leaves no nasty streaks across shiny surfaces - making it the perfect cleaning partner.


I have to admit it did feel much stronger than ordinary paper towels.

I tried it out on my Most Hated Task Number 1 - Cleaning the TV


I am in constant battle not just with the dust that is attracted to the TV but also the greasy little finger marks that appear every day when my three year old gets a little too interactive with her favourite programs. I don't help myself by having a black glass TV stand that shows up even the tiniest speck of dust.

I have tried all sorts of things from feather dusters to micro fibre cloths but have never found the perfect solution.

I gave the Thirst Pocket Multi Cloth a go, dampened with my regular anti static spray. Just one sheet removed most of the dust from the TV, the stand and the other bits of equipment that none of us can live without these days. A second sheet tackled the greasy finger marks with no problem and with a third sheet for a final wipe over, it was done. Easy.

I know that the dust will be back next time I look but there are plenty more sheets on my roll!

 Most Hated Task Number 2 - Cleaning low level windows.

I have lots of glass doors in my house. They are lovely for keeping the rooms light but with one of these..

...you get a lot of these.

I usually use old newspaper with my glass cleaner (as recommended by Kim and Aggie of 'How Clean is Your House?' fame) but on small panes of glass it can be a bit awkward and it does leave your hands feeling really grubby.

I tried the Thirst Pocket Multi Cloth. The claim that this paper towel Performs Like a Cloth is actually quite true. One sheet did a brilliant job...

...and I was very happy to throw this straight into the bin.

The Verdict - far superior to a paper towel, it lives up to the claims it makes and will definitely be making my life a little easier from now on.

MRRSP £2.39 from Tesco, Sainsburys, Morrisons and Asda.